COMMON RELATIONSHIP PROBLEMS AND HOW TO RESOLVE THEM!

Want to share some thought on this topic, because I consider it quite paramount. We constantly involve ourselves in relationships (friendship, marriage, family etc) directly or otherwise. Some of the points you will see here, I saw somewhere, edited and modified them to suit the topic while some are purely mine, so please feel free to add yours, after all, we live to learn!
With that in mind, I will start by saying, If someone ever says “I’ve never had an argument with my partner” or “we never fight”, they are lying! Every relationship has its fair share of issues, whether you want to call them conflicts, confusions or problems. What is more important is to get yourself out of these conflicting areas and ensure that they are kept at the bay.

Here are some of the common problems that malign most relationships on the planet.

1. Lack of crisis management
Some may think that crisis management is too vague a term to be used and thrown around. Well, that is not the case. Crisis management involves a deliberate effort towards assembling your thoughts and understanding the issues that cause fights and arguments in the first place. Ask yourself, “What is causing the problem?” Then think, “What can I do to solve it?” And lastly, “What can I do to prevent it?” It isn’t rocket science but then very few women actually spend time to think about it. Remember, sometimes the simplest solutions are in close proximity from us. All we need to do is- think!


2. Dishonesty
If there was one thing that came above anything else while ruining a relationship, this would be it – dishonesty. Many a times, we let out ‘little lies’ and then call them ‘white lies’ for our own convenience. If you are confident of yourself and not faking anything in your relationship, there should be no reason for even the smallest of lies. Talk about things that are not too appropriate to be said directly, but do not lie! Be honest but polite about yourself, your thoughts, ideas, expectations, and your love. Dishonesty may save us from a small argument today, but can come back and haunt us years later. You will break her/ his trust and her /his heart, if she ever finds out that you have been dishonest. There is nothing more painful than lack of trust in a relationship.


3. Loss of romance
It is a harsh world out there and most of our lives are spent in trying to make a buck. Our dreams and career paths steal a lot of time keeping us away from our loved ones. Take time out from your busy schedule to bring back the romance in your relationship. It can be as little as spontaneously going out for a glass of wine by the pier or giving her a surprise and fixing her breakfast in bed or even lighting a few scented candles in the lounge on a cold dark evening to spice things up a bit. Remember, such little steps may only need half an hour, but they will have long term impact on your relationship. It will keep the “romantic teen” inside you alive and kicking and you will surely bat your eyelids the next time she comes back home with flowers and looks into your eyes!


4. Unfaithfulness
If you think only men cheat, or that cheating only occurs in straight relationships, you are wrong! Anyone can cheat, and that includes women. Sex, money, passion, lust, lack of love, boredom – there are many reasons to drive you there. But mind you, none of these are good enough reasons to justify the act. If there is loss of interest or if the relationship is beyond reconciliation, talk about it with your partner. There is no going back after the act happens and the damage is unimaginable. Hearts are broken, trust is lost, feelings are hurt, and love loses meaning – it’s just not worth it.
Relationship is the blissful union of different people having different personalities. If you think that your relationship has too many problems, you are not alone. Blissful relationships are all about compromises, adjustments, reconciliations and more importantly, love, so protect it.


5. Financial woes
Be actively involved in your finances and be wise about money. Spending on a few luxuries in life is good but do not indulge in extravagance, if you cannot afford it. Create a budget plan and stick to it. Money is easy to spend but difficult to earn. It is painful to see all the love, effort and hard work put into a relationship go waste because of financial instability.



6. Comparing our partners with our ex(s)
Comparing our partners with our ex(s) is one sure quick way of hitting the "break-up" destination.
This comparison comes in variant shades: it may come as a quick mental comparison between our partner and our ex in some situations without voicing it out, sometimes we voice out such comparisons at our partners back, especially when we are with friends, and sometimes some even go as far as voicing them out to the hearing of our partners, albeit sometimes unintentionally and sometimes purely voluntarily for whatsoever reason. Comments or thoughts like... If ....is here, she will definitely come up with a better idea, If.... Was there, things won't be this messy, ....will never be this stupid and clueless over a simple task, ....prefers us having breakfast in the living room, ....prefers we go to the cinema with our home prepared pop-corn, bla bla bla, does nothing other than ruin your relationship and hurt your significant other.
Stop comparing your partner with your ex, mentally or otherwise, because by constantly comparing them, you are not only straining your relationship, compelling your partner to live under the shadow of your ex, but worst, you are indirectly asking your partner to throw her own unique personality to the trash because it is not good enough for you.
  Realize-that the relationship you had with your ex is over, so get over it and focus on your present partner. Accept, love, cherish, adore and care for her as though she is the only girl /guy in the world.


7. Unrealistic expectations
Whenever you find yourself struggling to come in terms with ‘unfair’ situations in your relationship, sit back, take a deep breath and think to yourself, “What do I really expect? Is this what I deserve?” Most women often expect too much, and in some cases, too less. It is very tough to keep a balance between more and less, but a moment of thought can usually help us to come to terms with our expectations. Always remember, you should expect no less or no more than what you deserve.


8. Lack of intimate compatibility
intimate relations with your partner play a very important role in your relationship. Lack of sex can lead to depression, arguments, loss of excitement and, in worst cases, even infidelity. Find time from your busy routine for each other’s physical needs. Be adventurous, try new things inside the bedroom, and spice things up!


9. Lack of respect
It is very important that you treat your partner with respect. There is no single thing that you can say or do to show respect. It just means backing her/him up no matter what. It can be something as small as taking her/his side in an argument on the dinner table with friends, or agreeing with her/his views while having a challenging conversation with the family. You must expect the same. Loss of respect is a significant blow to the balance of a relationship. Give respect, get respect.


10. Practice what you preach
It’s one thing putting your thoughts, ideas and expectations forward; it’s another thing to step up and practice what you preach. If you have certain demands or expectations from your partner, be ready to put them to practice in your own life. It can be as simple as being aware of your own punctuality levels before asking her /him to ‘always be on time’. You will gain respect from your partner if you follow what you say.


11. Taking each other for granted
It is one of the easiest traps that many couples fall into. Think of the moment when you were asking your partner out and your only dream in life then was to be with her /him forever. Well, guess what, your dream has come true! Appreciate the fact that what you only dreamt of earlier is what you have now. Think of every moment spent with her /him as a gift and cherish every romantic look that she /he gives you. Never take your partner and her love for granted.


12. Lack of maturity
By maturity, I'm not talking about age nor physical growth and development, rather the mental ability and capability of taking responsibility for our actions and inaction's.
With relationship comes love, responsibility, commitment and devotion. It requires a lot of hard work and effort to lay a solid foundation of a good relationship and to keep the momentum going. Often enough, many do not seem to be adoptive of the maturity levels that are required to keep this relationships strong. It can be as simple as giving up on an argument sometimes, if it is not worth arguing. Be responsible and realize from deep down inside that you are shaping the life of another person.